Chapter 12: Captain Gloaty O’Gloatface

Jos sat, holding her mug of rum with both hands as she stared out the stern windows of her Captain’s quarters. In the distance, the last remnants of the Risen boneship sank beneath the waves. Part of her was relieved. None of her crew had died or been lost in the attack. Jorg’s quick actions with his shouts had prevented anyone from jumping overboard from the Abomination’s fear-roars, and what wounds her crew had received were being seen to. 

Another part of her, the part screaming in the back of her mind, vibrated with anxiety. At that moment, Captain Elaine O’Quinn was pulling her airship, The Fury of Tyria, alongside Hiraeth. It was a fair bet O’Quinn would be standing on Hiraeth’s main deck in a matter of minutes, if she wasn’t already. And then…

And then?

True, she’d asked Nexx to take care of it, to liaise with the good Captain, to thank her for the rescue. But Jos knew The Fury of Tyria’s captain. Intimately. She knew Elaine would not be satisfied with just the ship’s first mate, she’d want that appreciation, that gratitude, that… fawning to come from the ship’s captain.

She’d want it to come from Jos.

“Well that’s too bad,” Jos muttered. She scoffed to herself. She wasn’t about to go out there and give Elaine the satisfaction of coming to the rescue. Not again.

“What’s too bad?” The door closed.

Shit.

Jos hadn’t even heard the door open. She wondered what the hell Elaine was doing, barging into the captain’s quarters unannounced, but then she knew. She was being Captain Elaine O’Quinn, that’s what she was doing.

Elaine cleared her throat. “Sorry, I knocked but you didn’t answer.”

Hidden behind the high back of her chair, Jos’s face twisted into a skeptical frown. After a few seconds, she realized maybe she had actually heard a soft knock. She took one last swig of her mug and shoved herself up from the chair. 

“So, come to gloat?” Jos stepped around the chair and felt the deck pitch under her feet. Instinctively, she grabbed onto the back of the chair for support.

Elaine’s face, chiseled and striking, blanched. “Lina, I… What the hell? How are you…?”

The room spun as Jos scoffed. “Oh, don’t give me that shit. Don’t tell me you didn’t know.”

“No.” The other woman shook her head. “Seriously, I had no idea. No one does. Wha… What the hell are you doing here?”

The question seemed oddly obvious to Jos, making her think the other woman meant something else entirely. Still, with her brows furrowed, she gave the only answer in  her foggy mind. “Uh… running cargo?”

Elaine took a step forward then stopped. “Lina, I… We all thought you were dead. Everyone… they think you’re dead.”

“Kinda the point.” Jos’s mouth felt very dry. She moved to reach for her mug but realized she’d set it on the floor when she got up. The room twisted as she bent over to pick it up. At the last second, her hand found the arm of her high-backed chair, keeping her from falling over. When she stood back up, her hair covered her face. 

Without asking, Elaine dropped down into a chair of her own. She leaned back and ran her fingers through her hair. “Are you drunk?”

Jos spat a few stray hairs from her mouth the brushed the rest away from her face. “Pff… no.”

Even with that slight bit of head movement, the room spun. Staring down at the other woman also seemed to make her vision twist, so she pulled out another chair and plopped down. “Maybe a little. And it’s a legitimate run, just so you know. Contract. From the Ar—Arcane Council. So, no funny business.”

“Lina, I don’t care about whatever your running. I…” Elaine’s eyes closed and she clenched her jaw. “You let everyone think you’re dead? By hiding on some dinky boat?”

Jos sat in silence, unsure of how to answer. Then she realized she didn’t need to answer. Hiraeth was her ship. She was its captain.

After several long moments, Jos had lost track of the conversation. “What are you doing here, Elaine?”

 “So that’s it then. That’s how it is?” Captain O’Quinn straightened up in her seat. “Fine. I wanted to make sure everyone was all right.”

“Yep. We’re all right. Now that Captain O’Quinn has come to the rescue.” Jos’s throat burned and felt clammy. She went to take another swig, but her mug was empty. Desperate for something wet, she shoved her seat back and headed for the rum cabinet.

“We’ve been tracking rogue boneships for the last month, so you were pretty lucky we were in the area.”

Jos twisted the spigot on the cask. The dark liquid streamed into her cup. Somehow, the rum poured straight, but Jos still felt the deck shifting under her feet. And it was getting on her nerves. She wondered how the seas were suddenly so rough, everything was clear and calm just a few minutes ago.

Despite the pitching deck, she stumbled her way back to her seat. “Yep. Lucky.”

Elaine shook her head and looked out the window. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough, Lina?”

Chuckling to herself, Jos took a big swig of her rum and slammed the cup down. The dark liquid sloshed up and over the sides all over the table. She reveled in the bittersweet drink on her tongue. Letting out a loud ahhh, she smacked her lips and leveled her gaze at the other woman.“Nope. And it’s Jos now. Captain Jos Blackfyre, unless you’ve forgotten whose ship you’re on.”

“In case.”

Jos’s face twisted and she leaned back. “What?”

“It’s ‘in case you’ve forgotten,’ not unless.”

“Shut the hell up.” Jos took another gulp. “You don’t get to come over to my ship, correct my grammar and be all Captain Gloaty O’Gloatface. This is… Is my ship. Hiraeth. Mine.”

Elaine shook her head. “Gloaty O’Gloatface, huh? What the hell are you talking about, Lina?”

“JOS, damn it!” Jos propped her elbows on the table and pointed a finger at Elaine. “You didn’t listen to me. It’s Jos now. You never listen to me.” She rested her chin on one hand. It was suddenly very hard to keep her eyes open. 

“Lin—Jos.” Elaine held her hands up in surrender. “I don’t understand.”

 “Of course you don’t. How could you. Perfect Elaine always coming to the rescue, right? Getting me out of jail to join The Pact. Getting me through Pact basic training. Dragging me along on your first mission. You jus’ didn’t listen. What if I didn’t wanna to go?”

“All right. You’re done.” Elaine reached for Jos’s mug, but Jos snatched it away.

Rum splashed up out of the mug and all over Jos’s shoulder. “Don’ you touch my blasted rum. Iss mine. And I’m a grown-ass woman. I’ll drink as much as I want. I’m an adult.”

“Clearly.” Elaine rolled her eyes and chuckled. Leaning back in her seat, she turned her gaze away from Jos and stared out the window. “Some memory you have, you know? Everything you said is exactly how it happened. Except it’s bullshit.”

“No issnot.”

“Yes it is. You are the one who convinced me to fight. And you were only in jail because you took the blame for my fight.”

An image of Private Gregor’s broken nose popped into her head and Jos laughed “It was a good fight though.”

“And that mission? I was given command of the mission because that creep of a lieutenant came on to you and you knocked him on his ass. I made you my squad leader because you were mountains above the rest of the squad, myself included.”

“Oh yeah.” A bubble of laughter trickled up rom Jos’s gut. “That guy… that LT really was an ass.”

“Lina.” The other woman let out a long, exasperated sigh. “Jos. Talk to me. What happened?”

“Fine.” Jos let out a sigh of her own, she knew Elain was right. Straightening her back, she did her best to act as sober and professional as she could. But, as the words formed in her head, they twisted and became something else entirely. “I wanted to come back and tell you, but after Calden turned to Mordremoth… We began a secret love affair. We had thirty seven half-plant, half-human, half-Mordremoth babies. Eventually I was so… ashamed I—”

Jos burst out laughing. She’d tried to keep a straight face, but it wasn’t working. She knew her lie was beyond ridiculous.

Elaine shook her head and stood up. 

“What? No, no, no, no. Wait. Where are you going? Sit down, have a drink.”

“No, you’ve had enough for both of us.” Captain O’Quinn scoffed. “This is all some kind of Six-cursed joke to you, isn’t it?”

Jos patted at the table. “Please? Just have a drink. A little rum. Shhh… I get this special batch from—”

Elaine’s face morphed into a scarlet, rage-filled mask. “I don’t care about your gods-damned rum! Melandru help me, but when I saw your face I had hoped that…”

A small smile appeared on Jos’s face, but she forced it down. It was fun, watching Elaine get so worked up.

The Pact Captain licked her lower lip and set her jaw. “No. I’m not doing this. You left The Pact. More importantly, you left me. So if you want Lina Fairington dead, she’s dead. Long live Captain Jos...whatever your name is now.”

Elaine turned, took a few steps and yanked open the door. 

“Blackfyre,” Jos mumbled.

“What?”

Jos held up her mug. “Captain Jos Blackfyre, of Hiraeth.”

Elaine shook her head and sneered, “Whatever. Have a nice day, Captain.” 

Jos took another swig as the door slammed shut.